D-DAY!

It’s 7 AM of THE DAY! Today is the day that the SPM results will be released. Two years of hard work have led to this point. The results will be announced at about 11 AM. I’m, already here at 7 in the morning getting breakfast at the McDonalds nearby. I get a large porridge. After completing the meal (without the chicken of course 🙂 ), I get ready for the long wait. Fortunately, I am prepared.
I am writing this post while waiting and I have my reading material in my bag. So, how am I feeling? Am I ready to face another significant event in the brief history of my life? The honest answer is YES. I have already mentally shifted my mindset to the stage where I am matured enough to not worry about the results. There is no way I can do anything to change the results NOW. There was a lot of time to put in more effort during the preparation phase and I think I did just that. So, why worry now?
Worrying does not change anything much less stop the inevitable.
-NGIM DA RUEY-
I know however what I can do. I can start preparing my applications for scholarships. This process can be tiring and boring but it is absolutely necessary. You would not give a 100 ringgit note to a stranger on the street would you? Same goes with colleges and sponsoring bodies. They want to know about you–all your achievements, failures, results, character traits and also personal and family details before giving you that significant sum of money to pursue your academic dream. “Work on completing those applications”, I tell myself.
Secondly, personal reflection. There are so many areas of my life that I fell have improved once I took the time to have an objective look at myself. Was what they were saying about my weaknesses and faults true? Do I really know who I am deep down? Is my life determined by who my parents are, where I am studying or worst of all what I have? I struggle sometimes to check whether the way I live is according to my true identity. So, by this point you are probably wondering whether I have found the answer-to one of life’s greatest mysteries? Have I managed to answer what philosophers have been debating over since the beginning of civilization? The answer is YES. I have already made this discovery public by putting it in my Instagram bio. CHILD OF GOD! That is who I am and that is why I do not worry nor fear. God helped me through the preparation phase where I struggled with stress and depression but hey, I’m still here. LIFE, bring it on!
In the end, here I am completing this post while waiting for the results. Am I just all talk and will I break down when I cannot meet my lofty expectations later? With a smirk on my face and a twinkle in my eye here I say to you, “we’ll see about that”.
Thank you for reading.

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